序：以今天为起点，正式开始回忆与记录。
在香港的时候，保e带我去坐过海渡轮，船在海面上摇摇晃晃，勾起无数往事。
小时候，在武汉只有长江大桥唯一一座过江桥时，需要过江上班的人们通常都更愿意坐渡轮往来于两岸。过年过节时，我们一家去家住汉口的舅舅家走动也需要坐渡轮过江。即使年纪还小，坐船也并不让我觉得害怕，喜欢一个人跑去甲板旁边，攀住船上的铁栏杆往下张望，看船尾在浑浊的江面上拖出一条雪白的尾巴。夏秋的江风吹到脸上潮潮暖暖，冬春时节有股威严的凌厉，偶尔有江鸥缓缓地在江面上盘旋，鸣声如歌似泣。等过了江，小脸蛋红彤彤的，头发上还留着湿漉漉的触感，这些都让我无比兴奋。
大约是因为童年不在母亲身边的时间太久，加上父母的不和，以至我的家庭观念一直淡薄，从小就是孤僻的小孩，胆大心粗、我行我素，即使独来独往也从不畏惧。虽然据母亲说，我从小就是孩子王，无论去那哪里，同龄甚至大一些的孩子都喜欢与我玩。读小学初中高中，一直有许多人主动向我表示友好甚至与我私交甚笃，男女都有，从来都不缺朋友，做什么都有人陪。但不知道为什么，每每回忆童年与少年的时光，记忆所至，依然满目苍凉，仍只能看见自己精神世界的孤独与自闭。
儿时一直住在离江堤不远的地方，学校亦是，所以即使不过江，偶尔我也会在休息时或放学后，独自一人飞快地骑着自行车，迅速穿过人潮与街道，去江堤散步，或在春天自己做风筝拿去放。一待就是一天。
渡口旁原来有几条废弃的旧船泊于岸边，扎了铁锚，再用粗大的铁链绑在竖于江岸的立柱上。船的骨架、座椅与围栏都悉数被人拆走，剩下光秃秃的甲板与绑铁链用的圆柱供人借坐。因停泊的时间太久，船身与铁链浸于水下的部分密密麻麻地长满大约半尺长的绿色水藻，随着水波起伏联翩，像穿着草裙的舞者。走在船上晃晃悠悠，人总是很少，我可以在上面一坐就是半天。即使是亲密的女友，也只有很少知道我有此习惯。
母亲就很少过问我的事情，所以有时候即使有事，也都自然而然地自行解决。幸而多数时候并无后患，即使有，也能很快自己找到了断的办法，因此骨子从小自有种浑然天成的无知而无畏的叛逆气势。这大约也是为什么会敢于17岁就独自飘洋过海去过另一种生活，然后在一个陌生国家的各个城市间四处迁徙，不觉疲倦。
但至今记得，在武汉的冬天，出国前的那几天。我再一次在一个有阳光的下午取了车匙独自去江边静坐。冬日的暖阳照在身上极舒服。那时对出国并非满心期待，毕竟是头次离家出远门，好奇中带稍许胆怯，知道自己并不如想像中那样坚强。那个下午的阳光与波光粼粼的江水给了我无比的勇气与镇定，仿佛漂洋过海也不过如同坐过江渡轮一样，并不可怕，反而可以见到更多的人，遇到更多新奇好玩的事，即使彼岸并不舒适，只要再坐上渡轮回到此岸，人生还是可以平稳地继续。这大约也是后来无论遇到怎样的人，怎样的事，依然可以坦然对待的原因之一。
儿时这种无知而无畏的精神长大以后渐渐转变为知而无畏、随遇而安。早熟而自闭的童年生活，使我获益良多。
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When I originally left a comment I seem to have clicked on the -Notify me when new comments are added- checkbox and now each time a comment is added I receive 4 emails with the exact same comment. Is there a means you are able to remove me from that service? Kudos!
After I originally commented I seem to have clicked the -Notify me when new comments are added- checkbox and now each time a comment is added I get four emails with the exact same comment. There has to be a means you are able to remove me from that service? Kudos!
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