今天Cherry没来上课,大约是计算好了,80%的出勤率意味的每周可以跷掉一节lab。
第一周没有理论课和摄影课,所以周五下午无事。中午放学以后,我们剩下的五个中国人小聚了一下,出去吃饭。本来想去阿里郎,商量了半天,都觉得离学校太远了,于是就近选了Sunshine。原本打算得好好的,吃完饭逛逛街,然后散步回家。谁知道刚放下筷子就接到Vivian的电话,说是有房子可以看看,马上就过去接我。只好和Candy约好晚点再见。
看房子的路上几经波折,先是Yurina要去报名考托福,等了十多分钟,后来眼看着Jeff桑冲过我们本应转弯的街口,又绕了一大圈。下午的太阳很毒辣,晒得我昏昏欲睡。脖子后面那一小块皮肤暴露在赤裸的日光下,渐渐发麻。身体里的水分流失得迅速而汹涌。
房子没有什么可看性。回到city时已经将近三点。冲进Starbucks买了一小杯Green Tea Frappuccino,找到Candy和Vivienne,继续逛街。依然保持小JoJo一贯的逛街作风,游离于所有商品之外,扫一眼,无目的地游荡,轻轻咬住杯子里的吸管,松开,再咬住,看Candy与Vivienne兴高采烈的逛着,自己也觉得高兴。一杯咖啡喝完,撑到无力。趁她们跑去New Zealand Nature买冰激凌的间隙,我盘腿坐在门外的石椅上抽了一支烟,缓和紧绷的胃部肌肉。
自从开始戒烟,身上的肉肉又慢慢跑了回来,腰上软软的,手到之处皆是脂肪。不过戒烟之事,势在必行。减肥并不是我吸烟的目的,自然也成为不了我戒烟的阻碍。不知道从什么时候开始,我竟成了一个胆大的人,决定了某件事,认定了某个人,就可以不管不顾全心全意。说不怕被骗不怕受伤,那绝对是假的,只是慢慢开始清楚,那些借口都不能成为胆怯的理由。我只是,只是再不想做那个在角落独自苍白的女子。我讨厌以前那个一直背着历史包袱前行的女人,自私而绝望,把希望寄托在别人身上,却忘了唯一的救赎只有自己。怕受伤害?那就别爱。所以我依然愿意相信,总有一天,会有某个男人出现,视我如宝,爱我无悔。
今天唯一失策的是背着一只单肩书包,东西太多,压得右边肩膀生疼,Candy陪我走了许多韩国店,想选一只好的双肩书包,因为从下周开始,书包里要背的东西就开始格外的多,除了必需的教材和笔记本以外,还有一大本A4 Visual Diary,装了二十只笔的巨型笔袋,巨尺(严格规定必须是450mm以上的钢板尺),裁纸刀,胶水等等。好在大部分必需品我自己都有,只需再买几样就齐备了。回家的路上右边手臂基本废掉了,肩膀酸痛,手都抬不起来。好在夕阳还是很美的,而且一到家就有又香又脆的三文鱼和饺子吃。吃了很多芥末,看架势,对芥末的渴望尤胜对三文鱼。
幸福果然是微小而纯粹的,如果你没有觉得幸福,那大约是你还没睁开看见幸福的眼睛。
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